Hi,
I know I have not posted in a while but here is the scenario. First, I am the other half, not married to a man that was DXED with BP along time before we met. We met 9/11/06. He never told me he was BP. I found out from his Mom some months later who told me he has depression at times. At this time his job was going downhill. The pay was yuck, not enough to pay bills. I was living at his parents till we had enough to get a place of our own cuz I worked too. We got enough and moved to our own place in May ’08 and it has been a fast ride downhill. He decided to quit his job as a truck driver and find another truck driving position. Well, no go. His blood pressure wouldnt stabilize not even with the newest medicines. So he ended up going back to the same employment only to get fired a month later for idling his truck. Well that was Sept 31. OK, now I need help. Since he doesnt communicate with me at all, I worry about the bills since I cannot pay them all. As of this moment, the stove and the refrig are going this month and the electric is being shut off. So what are we going to do. This is a man who is suppose to love me. How can a man put a loved one through that? Now he is so lazy that he took a month and a half off before filing for unemployment or looking for other employment. Remember I can’t talk to him. I have been accused of being possessive, acting as I own him and trying to tame him. He twists all I say to his way of thinking so I just say nothing. He does what he wants anyway.
So I have been forced to save my money and find a furnished effeciency for myself and also get my old job back. Yes, I am moving. I am a perdson who cares and has feelings and will not be dragged down by someone who is not in their right mind.
Now he did agree to one thing. He needs help. I got him into a free mental health program where he will have a psychiatrist, free medicine, counseling, individually and group. Well, who is to say he will carry through with this. Once he has the medicine and starts feeling better, he will say I feel good so why do I need this then we would be back to square one. His first appointment is on the 12 of Nov. He says he is going. But he has told me previously he is doing this for me. BS, he needs to do it for himself.
I will go to the first appointment with him but thats it for me. My happiness and my sanity are at stake. He has hurt me, verbally and mentally, not physically. So does anyone understand where I am coming from and how I feel?
When I go, I will tell him I love him and always will and when I see that he can hold a job and pay bills regularly then he can come and see me, who knows. I will also tell him I am doing this as much for him as I am myself.
I think you get the drift of all I am saying. This is so long I better hush!
Hugs,
Karen
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